Spent another £180 on my T5 CEM issue. So, that's £330 and I should get it tomorrow - then it needs to be fitted, then reprogrammed.
My mechanic - the funniest mechanic in the North West of England - says, "No problem pal, I have the kit. Don't worry."
So, I spent a couple of hours looking up quotes for a truck to take said T5 to a place in Nottingham who can reflash the CEM, stick on the original ABS pump and module and then do everything else to it that I want doing.
This car is getting expensive. After it's sorted I'm not going to see much change from £10K if I'm lucky
...and it will still be worth less than I paid for it lol