I'm not sure that the untrained eye can tell too much from crash test videos (except of course in cases of really gross failure where the entire passenger cell is crumpled:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mbe5ILICT4M). A car that is totally rigid isn't very good in a crash because the energy of the impact is not absorbed, merely transferred (to the occupants).
That is not to say that Teslas aren't safe - they are, extremely. So are Volvos.
In fact, almost every car these days is extremely safe. There's very little on the market with anything less than 3 NCAP stars, and most cars are 4 or 5. Compared to even a "good" car from the mid-90s, you are FAR safer today (Sorry 900 owners, but:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBDyeWofcLY - in fairness, the crash structures of the 900 date back to the early 80s, and compared to pretty much anything else of its day that's a very good result, but modern cars are a level above).
Volvo's stated goal that no-one should be killed in a new volvo from whenever it is is very laudable. It might be unachievable because there are certain things you can't possibly design for (eg getting between two 44 tonne artics that are having a head-on. No matter what car you're in in between them, you're dead), but having the goal is noble, and it's a good thing to have a high target that no one thinks is achievable (Tesla know this well!). Even if you don't make it all the way, you make it further than anyone thought you would or could.
As for which I'd rather be in?
Sorry, but I want a Tesla. I've been driving my Leaf and my V70, and each time I'm in the Leaf I miss the V70 seats and ride. Each time I'm in the V70, I miss the tranquility, smoothness and instant responsiveness of the Leaf. Until Volvo give us a BEV, Tesla is the one.